Blood happens

I got cut and bled on the kitchen floor the last time we were alone together; tiny, irregular circles of blood on a yellowed linoleum. I felt like it was my fault and you tried to console me. Blood happens I guess is what you were trying to say.

 We had some conversation. I remember it was serious. Was it about marriage? Maybe. I think so.

I’m trying to remember my motivations for not coming around for the next week after that.

 I even had left something; I think it was my wallet. Maybe I was embarrassed about the blood on the kitchen floor. Even though you tried to reassure me that you were attracted to me and that it didn’t matter.

blood on the floor

blood on the floor

 

 When I did finally get the nerve to call you, you brought my wallet out to me. I assumed you had a woman inside your house, and I just felt the whole thing was awkward. I was probably just being paranoid.

 I didn’t come in and I never saw you again until that night at Earp fest.

Do you know that I never really ever stopped thinking about you? Sometimes I remember us being complicated. Mostly I would think about how much I had to come to rely on you always being there for me. I don’t think you ever realized (or maybe you did?) how much I looked up to you and thought you may have walked on water at some point in your life or maybe even as a hobby.

 I lived a whole other life when I was with you. You showed me things and taught me things about the world and myself that I will always be thankful for.

Now everything is different. I’m happy that you have in your life what I think you always wanted. I could not have given you this life at the time when you needed it. Now sometimes you act like you want me back, but I don’t think you really do, and you should do us both a favor and stop acting like you do.

 

Advertisements
  1. #1 by Froghole The Klown on November 19, 2009 - 9:29 am

    *kisses it better* I mean your sense of peace, not the cut.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: